PinkBeltRage
don't worry, i'm japanese.
22 April 07 ¦ Permalink ¦
I was out getting a hot dog the other night. To go.
I hit the ice dispenser claw thingy a couple of times and then started filling up my paper cup with diet coke. It was really slow to fill, so I looked around at the other people in the place, while I waited.
Everyone was holding half-consumed hot dogs in their hands and staring up at the giant flatscreen on the wall.
I noticed all eyes were glued to FoxNews (Eek) and the story about the VA Tech massacre.
A family walked in and they looked up too, after ordering a round of chili dogs for themselves and turkey corn dogs for the kids.
Anyway, the man says to the woman while they fill their cups up with regular Coke . . .
Man: I haven’t watched much of this on the news. Have you?
Woman: Nope.
Man: Oh! BUT, I heard that the shooter was . . . Korean!
And here’s where they both pause and turn and look over their shoulders at me, standing about 5 feet away from them. We make eye contact, they both grimace at one another, their eyeballs looking like a giant god-hand came down, wrapped around their bodies and squeezed them. They whip their heads back to the soda machine and fumble for lids.
Me (thinking to myself): OMG! What the hell was that about? They actually looked scared of me!
At this point the woman speaks, loudly: Now honey, I think he was South Korean!
She pretty much shouts SOUTH KOREAN, btw.
And then in a hushed whisper to the man, she says, “It’s really rude to say that, you know. (Glance at me) You just really have to say South Korean!”
That was weird and I still don’t understand what was running through their minds in regards to me. I guess they thought I was Korean or something.
Anyway, when an Asian person does something horrible in the news, I’m usually like “Oh crap! Now everyone’s gonna hate me!”
I found myself going from my default annoyed facial expression to being extra smiley and actually trying to open my eyes a bit wider so I wouldn’t look like I was planning something devious with my usual tiny slanty-eyed appearance (hey, I was born this way!).
Anyway, for some reason, my initial freak-out about the VA Tech shooter wasn’t about this psycho dude being Asian… I was more bothered by the fact that he was an English major!
Wtf?
You know there’s that quote, something about the pen being mightier than the sword?
You expect that sort of behavior from engineers and like math majors, but not English majors!
And I know it’s really easy to buy a gun, but I just can’t believe no one raises an eyebrow of suspicion when some young nerdy kid walks into a store and purchases a gun and ammo.
I wonder if the person who sold it to him asked him what he was going to do with it. Or cautioned him about it and discussed gun safety.
Completely unrelated, but on an English Literature/reading sort of note, I love love love Dave Eggers new book, What is the What. It is one of the most amazing things I’ve read in a long time. I have about one chapter left which I’m dragging out and not wanting to finish.
Has anyone else read this book? So far it’s just me and my friend Jeff who are reading it. I don’t know anyone else who is currently reading it or has read it, but I think everyone should read this book.
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*Older articles. Read On!*
— josh h 22 April 07 #
— archie4oz 22 April 07 #
there are so many issues about the shooting that i have a problem with; mainly the way the media treats it. number one his ethnicity is constantly pointed out. number two this is just another reinforcement that “different” kids are “dangerous.” not that there weren’t warning signs with this guy, but little kids who are somehow different, have differing opinions or something, are seen as threats when they may just be free thinkers.
anyway. end rant.
— maggie 22 April 07 #
Is that photo from the NY Museum of Natural History? I actually have a photo of me posing as an exhibit under a spotlight right under that very sign. :)
Hope everything is going well with you, Joy. Please write more!!!
— patreesha 3 May 07 #
I didn’t realise you’d started writing again. My RSS feed hasn’t been picking up the non-front page entries.
I’m taking this course on Modern Asia, so I’m reading lots about “Asian-ness”. How sad that every generation will have to be untaught prejudice over and over, since it resurfaces so easily in cultural logic.
I just came out of a J.D. Salinger soaked weekend. I really identified with the social awkwardness, and all the cringing at society and all struggling to find moments to express ones self. I get that from your writing sometimes.
Apparently ‘Catcher in the Rye’ is the favourite of lots of lone gunmen types. They probably only see all the misfit stuff, and miss the humility in all those beautiful sublime moments like the frozen ducks, or the museum memory or Pheobe on the round-a-bout. I get that from your writing too, sometimes.
I liked ‘Franny and Zooey’ but apparently nobody else does, for some reason.
I’ve been meaning to check out Augustin Burroughs based on your recommendation for some time. I’ll check out Eggers’ book next.
Anyway, I thought I’d just share all that with you, seeing’s you share so much with us :)
Keep writing!
— ali b 9 May 07 #